So yesterday I watched the live action film of Cromartie High School. Reviews say that it follows the original story line very closely, but I found it hard to believe they resurrected Freddie Mercury to play his role. It was no surprise a Japanese guy with a tan played Freddie. Furthermore, the gorilla wasn't actually played by a gorilla, nor was the robot played by a robot. The only character who was believable was the horse, since it was played by a real horse. Surprisingly I recognised Itao Itsuji in a cameo, despite the fact he was wearing a mask. He looks so dumb you'd recognise him anywhere.
Well last night was New Years Eve, and I spent it doing nothing. I'm lost as to the excitement of fireworks. Until they can write words or draw pictures with them, there really doesn't seem to be a point. Last night channel 9 had a longass show to bring in the new year, and I glimpsed a music video of Ke$ha. She has got so much glitter on her face, if she gave a blowjob, it would never wash off. Weird sense of style.
Now that we're getting over the fact that it's holidays, my mum has decided I need to start tutoring now. Literally. Another half hour and it's 'back to school' time already. Oh joy.
Gin
Friday, December 31, 2010
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Return
Although I've experienced the most boring holiday imaginable, the only real negatives were lack of things and bipolar weather. Proof that we were in the middle of nowhere included a building that said "Medical Advice, Accountants, Solicitors". For a second I wondered, 'why do they all work together?' Then I realised there is probably just one guy who does it all. Being in an area with 99% Caucasian people, it was also highly uncomfortable. I also got an awesome picture which I can't upload because I've lost my USB cord, which says "In the loving memory of Bob Fail"; a plaque on a public bench. Oh how I lolled.
I finally finished the first sentence of Pride and Prejudice. Beat that.
Today was the first time I saw someone 'eat' Powerade with a chopstick. SOOO Asian.
"Y' gotta eat when you can, right?" -Musashi
I finally finished the first sentence of Pride and Prejudice. Beat that.
Today was the first time I saw someone 'eat' Powerade with a chopstick. SOOO Asian.
"Y' gotta eat when you can, right?" -Musashi
Friday, December 24, 2010
Kwissmus
yayz. I love the snow and reindeers at Christmas time. Oh wait that's the northern hemisphere. I love the bedrooms that turn into saunas, and looooong times spent with annoying family. yayz.
So my mum decided to have a barbeque today, and though we have all bugged Yeo for one for like 3 terms I did not look forward to my family one. Thanks to Ancient History lessons, I have learnt some archaeological skills. These were put to good use when searching through the back of my garage for an ancient artifact. Instead of a Holy Grill (use of pun), I found a holy shit. Covered in dust and cobwebs I dragged a piece of crap up to my house and set it out only to find that my mum doesn't know how to use it. Being the man of the house it is my duty to be a lazy asshole and do nothing about it.
Been watching some more anime recently and found this scene quite implicative.
Moral of the story? Never thumbs up under water.
While re-watching some favourite Gintama moments I must relive the wrestling match.
And of course who could forget the testicle breakdance:
Anyways, hopefully everyone's been having a good holidays, tomorrow I will be off to the Central Coast-ish area, to live in some hole with my family for 3 days. I shall return to whine about it soon.
Also found this episode of Gaki no Tsukai ass game.
Download the episode here-->http://gakifiles.blogspot.com/p/oogiri-daigassen.html to find the results.
So my mum decided to have a barbeque today, and though we have all bugged Yeo for one for like 3 terms I did not look forward to my family one. Thanks to Ancient History lessons, I have learnt some archaeological skills. These were put to good use when searching through the back of my garage for an ancient artifact. Instead of a Holy Grill (use of pun), I found a holy shit. Covered in dust and cobwebs I dragged a piece of crap up to my house and set it out only to find that my mum doesn't know how to use it. Being the man of the house it is my duty to be a lazy asshole and do nothing about it.
Been watching some more anime recently and found this scene quite implicative.
Moral of the story? Never thumbs up under water.
While re-watching some favourite Gintama moments I must relive the wrestling match.
And of course who could forget the testicle breakdance:
Anyways, hopefully everyone's been having a good holidays, tomorrow I will be off to the Central Coast-ish area, to live in some hole with my family for 3 days. I shall return to whine about it soon.
Also found this episode of Gaki no Tsukai ass game.
Download the episode here-->http://gakifiles.blogspot.com/p/oogiri-daigassen.html to find the results.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Villainy
After watching hundreds of episodes of action anime, I've decided to rant about the actions of villains. An example of their retardation involves a recent DBZ episode I watched, where Freeza waited about 1.5 episodes for Goku to load a Spirit bomb. Then suddenly he realised, "Oh crap, he's a loading up a super-mega-kill-everything attack", but by then it was of course too late. Retards.
Another thing is how cocky they are. Seriously, every single time two people face each other in a fight, at least one if not both parties will believe they are stronger. This can be seen in every single battle in Rurouni Kenshin. Funnily enough, about 95% of the time, the cocky ass loses, and the other 5% of the time they lose the rematch. Common convos sound like:
Villain: "Get ready to be defeated!"
Hero: "No, you're the one who will lose!"
Villain: "Is that a joke? It's very funny. I will easily defeat you!"
Hero: "Ummm, no I'll definitely win."
Villain: "Hahaha, too bad you will certainly lose!"
*Hero rapes the shit out of villain*
Villain: "Damn."
I finally found the OVAs for Gurren Lagann, and they sure are funny.
That situation is hard to explain.
Only 9 days 7 hours til No Laughing Spy!
Another thing is how cocky they are. Seriously, every single time two people face each other in a fight, at least one if not both parties will believe they are stronger. This can be seen in every single battle in Rurouni Kenshin. Funnily enough, about 95% of the time, the cocky ass loses, and the other 5% of the time they lose the rematch. Common convos sound like:
Villain: "Get ready to be defeated!"
Hero: "No, you're the one who will lose!"
Villain: "Is that a joke? It's very funny. I will easily defeat you!"
Hero: "Ummm, no I'll definitely win."
Villain: "Hahaha, too bad you will certainly lose!"
*Hero rapes the shit out of villain*
Villain: "Damn."
I finally found the OVAs for Gurren Lagann, and they sure are funny.
That situation is hard to explain.
Only 9 days 7 hours til No Laughing Spy!
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Ponderisms
For the first time in my life I dread the holidays. Boring trip with family, license tests, reading Austen, sounds like crap. But the first week has been pretty good.
While watching DBZ in it's original language for the first time I've discovered it's only over 8000. For those that understood that sentence, yes, our childhoods were lies.
I went for a practice run of the P plate course today, only to fail within 15 seconds. Throughout the 2 hours of practice I managed about 20 fails. I also got to see the past results of students, with 90% being the pass mark for one aspect of the test. Some guy scored 108. Beast.
Japan has passed a bill which massively limits the types of manga and anime we get in the future. Anything that implies sex, drugs or violence among under 18s will be severely fucked by the government. I'm not a fan, but anything that implies homosexuality is to be immediately banned. 'Extremely violent' series such as anything from Shonen Jump can't be bought by people under 15 due to graphic violence. Future ecchi comedies may as well be cancelled. I fear future Evangelion movies may be in doubt.
On a good note, Gintama is coming back in April so nothing else really matters.
Happy holidays and welcome back to the cadets. I'll go back to practising kamehameha waves.
While watching DBZ in it's original language for the first time I've discovered it's only over 8000. For those that understood that sentence, yes, our childhoods were lies.
I went for a practice run of the P plate course today, only to fail within 15 seconds. Throughout the 2 hours of practice I managed about 20 fails. I also got to see the past results of students, with 90% being the pass mark for one aspect of the test. Some guy scored 108. Beast.
Japan has passed a bill which massively limits the types of manga and anime we get in the future. Anything that implies sex, drugs or violence among under 18s will be severely fucked by the government. I'm not a fan, but anything that implies homosexuality is to be immediately banned. 'Extremely violent' series such as anything from Shonen Jump can't be bought by people under 15 due to graphic violence. Future ecchi comedies may as well be cancelled. I fear future Evangelion movies may be in doubt.
On a good note, Gintama is coming back in April so nothing else really matters.
Happy holidays and welcome back to the cadets. I'll go back to practising kamehameha waves.
Monday, November 22, 2010
End of the road.
Unfortunately the producers of this blog have run out of budget. Hopefully it will return, but we are on hiatus for now.
Fenny's Monja everyone.
Fenny's Monja everyone.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Adults, construction and excursions
On the weekend we went shopping, and my grandma has gained experience points in retardation. She walked past the seafood section and decided to buy a lobster because it looked fresh. When we got home and my mum asked her how to cook it and she replied: "You have to cook it?".
I found a video the other day showing the maturity of adults. Laughing at a fart. Yes, those are actual adults in a real meeting. I am constantly surprised by the level of screwed we are.
Many people who follow the news may know that a train line extension has been planned for the Carlingford line, connecting Clyde to Epping. However this project has been delayed from 2000 to 2014, and after Gillard's term (ending in '13/'14), most likely the next party will further postpone the arrangements. Some people wonder, does the whole world have this issue? China obviously doesn't: Fastass Construction. Holy shit, that's some ninjashit building.
Finally I'd like to rage a little at excursions. Most people will agree that the majority of school excursions are mostly dull and boring. However that is because not many people have listened to Ancient History lectures. Listing the 151 original Pokemon, playing Pokemon hangman, solving over a hundred levels of Unblock Me, there is endless fun to be found. Plus the excitement of the building catching fire added to the overall fun day out. No but seriously, it was a great break from school. Also saw a shirtless, shoeless, anorexic guy sobbing while drinking beer. I'm guessing he fucked up somewhere along the way. And there was an old black man who was driving a motorised vehicle for the disabled. He had long dreadlocks and 3 beard dreadlocks. As he drove by I just thought "they see me rolling...".
Hopefully this will be a good week before the week of death.
I found a video the other day showing the maturity of adults. Laughing at a fart. Yes, those are actual adults in a real meeting. I am constantly surprised by the level of screwed we are.
Many people who follow the news may know that a train line extension has been planned for the Carlingford line, connecting Clyde to Epping. However this project has been delayed from 2000 to 2014, and after Gillard's term (ending in '13/'14), most likely the next party will further postpone the arrangements. Some people wonder, does the whole world have this issue? China obviously doesn't: Fastass Construction. Holy shit, that's some ninjashit building.
Finally I'd like to rage a little at excursions. Most people will agree that the majority of school excursions are mostly dull and boring. However that is because not many people have listened to Ancient History lectures. Listing the 151 original Pokemon, playing Pokemon hangman, solving over a hundred levels of Unblock Me, there is endless fun to be found. Plus the excitement of the building catching fire added to the overall fun day out. No but seriously, it was a great break from school. Also saw a shirtless, shoeless, anorexic guy sobbing while drinking beer. I'm guessing he fucked up somewhere along the way. And there was an old black man who was driving a motorised vehicle for the disabled. He had long dreadlocks and 3 beard dreadlocks. As he drove by I just thought "they see me rolling...".
Hopefully this will be a good week before the week of death.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Zombie Invasion Survival Guide
I personally enjoy a good horror movie, with zombie invasion style ones at the top of my list. However my main issue with most films, is that the characters seem to have never actually seen a zombie invasion film themselves, thus, they die. I've decided that since 2012 is nearing, I will write a guide for all the people who deserve to survive but don't know how.
5 Rules of Survival
1. Never go alone.
You know those times when some idiot says: "Hey, maybe I should go check it out?", runs out into the darkness with a torch and dies? Try not to be that idiot.
2. Never go alone to find the guy who went alone.
Seriously, learn from other's mistakes. If one dumbass goes and gets eaten, don't try to find him, you'll only get eaten yourself.
3. Finish it.
How many times has the phrase: "Is it dead?" been someone's last words? If you hit the zombie in the face with a bat, continue to beat the living shit out of it (Or dying shit out of it), don't stop to check.
4. Don't save him.
Doubtlessly someone will fall over right when being chased by zombies and chances are, you are the only one to turn around and see the guy on the ground. I know it may be harsh, but fuck 'im. He is so screwed for not tying his laces up, running back will only screw you over too.
5. Check it.
Throughout your adventure, you will run into many little obstacles which may lead to your face getting eaten. So it is in your best interests to check everything before you do anything. E.g. fuel level in a car, ammo in a gun, water/food in your bag, laces tied, doors locked etc.
One more piece of advice which isn't a rule but more of a guideline, is don't shit in private. Yes, you may be asking: "What the fuck? You want me to shit in front of you?", so I will answer, "Do you want to die shitting yourself?". Make sure people are within range of you so that if you are getting raped by a zombie's mouth, they can shoot it's ass.
Some other factors of surviving a zombie invasion include weaponry choices. Recently reading a blog I discovered some interesting facts. The best melee weapon would be a crowbar, while a ranged weapon would be a .22 Calibre Long Rifle. A crowbar can be used for opening locked doors or crates as well as de-braining. While the rifle is quite powerful and ammo is easily found for it. However they only work for Americans. (for more info American Zombie Survival Guide).
Since guns are hard to find in Australia, more commonly found and useful weapons include cricket bats, gardening hoes, and molotov cocktails. I also advise the use of young siblings as sacrifices. But we as a nation should be more prepared for what may come. So I suggest the government get working on some zombie killin' defence. Here is a list of ranged weapons Australia should have a think about designing: Weapons List
My favourite being the good ole rocket-propelled-chainsaw.
There is so much more to life than sitting around studying and playing games, we may run into more troubles then paying taxes in the future. As Columbus from Zombieland once said, "It's amazing how fast the world can go from bad to total shit storm."
So suit up everybody, and let's go kill some bitches!
5 Rules of Survival
1. Never go alone.
You know those times when some idiot says: "Hey, maybe I should go check it out?", runs out into the darkness with a torch and dies? Try not to be that idiot.
2. Never go alone to find the guy who went alone.
Seriously, learn from other's mistakes. If one dumbass goes and gets eaten, don't try to find him, you'll only get eaten yourself.
3. Finish it.
How many times has the phrase: "Is it dead?" been someone's last words? If you hit the zombie in the face with a bat, continue to beat the living shit out of it (Or dying shit out of it), don't stop to check.
4. Don't save him.
Doubtlessly someone will fall over right when being chased by zombies and chances are, you are the only one to turn around and see the guy on the ground. I know it may be harsh, but fuck 'im. He is so screwed for not tying his laces up, running back will only screw you over too.
5. Check it.
Throughout your adventure, you will run into many little obstacles which may lead to your face getting eaten. So it is in your best interests to check everything before you do anything. E.g. fuel level in a car, ammo in a gun, water/food in your bag, laces tied, doors locked etc.
One more piece of advice which isn't a rule but more of a guideline, is don't shit in private. Yes, you may be asking: "What the fuck? You want me to shit in front of you?", so I will answer, "Do you want to die shitting yourself?". Make sure people are within range of you so that if you are getting raped by a zombie's mouth, they can shoot it's ass.
Some other factors of surviving a zombie invasion include weaponry choices. Recently reading a blog I discovered some interesting facts. The best melee weapon would be a crowbar, while a ranged weapon would be a .22 Calibre Long Rifle. A crowbar can be used for opening locked doors or crates as well as de-braining. While the rifle is quite powerful and ammo is easily found for it. However they only work for Americans. (for more info American Zombie Survival Guide).
Since guns are hard to find in Australia, more commonly found and useful weapons include cricket bats, gardening hoes, and molotov cocktails. I also advise the use of young siblings as sacrifices. But we as a nation should be more prepared for what may come. So I suggest the government get working on some zombie killin' defence. Here is a list of ranged weapons Australia should have a think about designing: Weapons List
My favourite being the good ole rocket-propelled-chainsaw.
There is so much more to life than sitting around studying and playing games, we may run into more troubles then paying taxes in the future. As Columbus from Zombieland once said, "It's amazing how fast the world can go from bad to total shit storm."
So suit up everybody, and let's go kill some bitches!
Monday, November 8, 2010
Ducks, cigarettes and Asians
So yesterday I was attacked by a duck. I saw it coming from a mile away. Those beady black eyes and the weird bit of feathers on the back of its head, we were destined to be enemies. Luckily a human outruns a duck. Fucking creeks.
Anyways, there's an old guy on the train who catches it regularly. Mostly people will see him in the afternoons once in a while, but I always run into him in my free periods (since I catch the late train). A general description for this guy would be: yellowy white-haired, wrinkled, dirty, pedaphilic and cigarette-smelling old turd. I swear he sleeps in cigarettes cause the whole carriage smells like smoke when he's in it. I've actually seen him rolling joints at Carlo station. What the hell is wrong with our society? How can people like this be allowed to roam in public? If only this was the Dark Ages.
If anyone has ever been shopping in a Chinese grocery store, they will know of this issue. The issue of what I call "Shoulderchargeanyoneintheway" syndrome. Now say if you go shopping at Woolworths and run into for example a Caucasian person, if they are even within one metre of your direct line of sight, they will apologise, as if they've committed some great crime against a person of high status. If this happened within an Asian grocery, I suggest you tense up, because you will get forcibly pushed until you are out of the way. The other day some woman smacked me in
the shin with her basket and proceeded to shoulder me even though we were standing in a two person wide aisle. Word of advice for future shopping trips, learn some parkour.
Today I had stomach pains and told my grandma. Despite the fact I told her it began around recess, she continues to argue it was because I ate ice cream at 5pm. Somehow my stomach saw the future and knew what was coming and started hurting to warn me of a poor choice in the future. Top Asian superstitions.
When it comes to digestive problems, I'm sure this guy's got all the answers:
Listen up!
Let’s say you drink too much strawberry milk, and have to use the bathroom in the middle of the night.
But it’s cold outside your bed.
You don’t want to get up, but the urge to urinate is just too strong!
You make up your mind to go!
You run to the bathroom, stand in front of the toilet, and let loose!
You think that all your life has led to this moment!
But then you realize!
It isn’t the bathroom, you’re still in bed!
That feeling of lukewarm wetness spreads like wildfire!
But you don’t stop! You can’t stop!
That’s what I’m talking about!
THAT’S THE TRUTH OF THE STRAWBERRY MILK!
DO YOU GET IT!?” -Sakata Gintoki
Anyways, there's an old guy on the train who catches it regularly. Mostly people will see him in the afternoons once in a while, but I always run into him in my free periods (since I catch the late train). A general description for this guy would be: yellowy white-haired, wrinkled, dirty, pedaphilic and cigarette-smelling old turd. I swear he sleeps in cigarettes cause the whole carriage smells like smoke when he's in it. I've actually seen him rolling joints at Carlo station. What the hell is wrong with our society? How can people like this be allowed to roam in public? If only this was the Dark Ages.
If anyone has ever been shopping in a Chinese grocery store, they will know of this issue. The issue of what I call "Shoulderchargeanyoneintheway" syndrome. Now say if you go shopping at Woolworths and run into for example a Caucasian person, if they are even within one metre of your direct line of sight, they will apologise, as if they've committed some great crime against a person of high status. If this happened within an Asian grocery, I suggest you tense up, because you will get forcibly pushed until you are out of the way. The other day some woman smacked me in
the shin with her basket and proceeded to shoulder me even though we were standing in a two person wide aisle. Word of advice for future shopping trips, learn some parkour.
Today I had stomach pains and told my grandma. Despite the fact I told her it began around recess, she continues to argue it was because I ate ice cream at 5pm. Somehow my stomach saw the future and knew what was coming and started hurting to warn me of a poor choice in the future. Top Asian superstitions.
When it comes to digestive problems, I'm sure this guy's got all the answers:
Listen up!
Let’s say you drink too much strawberry milk, and have to use the bathroom in the middle of the night.
But it’s cold outside your bed.
You don’t want to get up, but the urge to urinate is just too strong!
You make up your mind to go!
You run to the bathroom, stand in front of the toilet, and let loose!
You think that all your life has led to this moment!
But then you realize!
It isn’t the bathroom, you’re still in bed!
That feeling of lukewarm wetness spreads like wildfire!
But you don’t stop! You can’t stop!
That’s what I’m talking about!
THAT’S THE TRUTH OF THE STRAWBERRY MILK!
DO YOU GET IT!?” -Sakata Gintoki
Friday, November 5, 2010
Ashfield, swimming pools and him
So last weekend I went to Ashfield RSL club to have lunch to celebrate my grandma's birthday. I was kind of looking forward to it, since there would be food involved. However food wasn't quite the word I would use upon tasting the 'samples' offered. For example, the dumpling tasted more like meat flavoured biscuits. There was capsicum flavoured noodles. And someone thought it was smart to use noodles as spring roll filling. Then I went to get some soft drinks and half the dispensers were filled with soda water. When it got to desert, I wasn't even in the mood anymore. Lets just say it wasn't even close to the epic flaventure I had at Star City.
Since I live in a townhouse, I have access to a medium sized swimming pool. However since there are about 50 bogans and mentally retarded teenagers within a half kilometre radius, it is in poor condition to say the least. There used to be a gym inside, but all the gym equipment got stolen or broken. And someone managed to rip off the blades of the ceiling fan, 4 metres off the ground. The spa is always filled with piss, the steam machine in the sauna is filled with piss, and the toilets are generally overflowing with piss. The taps haven't worked in years, and last weekend I noticed they replaced the taps. Uh oh.
Fortunately the female bathroom is in very good condition, so on a late night I would use that one. However when other people are at the pool, I must harden my resolve and force myself to have a quick shower in a doorless, windowless, tap handle-missing, shower head-broken shower stall. Years ago the council installed metal bars over the windows to prevent people breaking in. Crowbars were a simple answer to that obstacle. Nowadays, I'm just happy I leave the swimming pool with no STDs.
Although I haven't raged much on our maths teacher, I think we all know what Haunter evolves into. The other day I attempted to get a bookmark, and he spent 20 minutes marking my questions one at a time. One example was where I got the answer of 6.46 something and he got 6.40. This led to him redoing the question and his answer was I quote "You forgot to multiply by two". How the- what the- argh fuck it. I taught him where he went wrong and we moved on. But seriously, I am so screwed for next year. If only an unfortunate accident happened...
So ends another troublesome week of work and play. Everyone is probably stressed with everything but "You can do it!~" Piece out, and I'll leave you with another great lesson from the one and only:
"Stress makes you bald, but it's stressful to avoid stress, so you end up stressed out anyway, so in the end there's nothing you can do." -Sakata Gintoki
Since I live in a townhouse, I have access to a medium sized swimming pool. However since there are about 50 bogans and mentally retarded teenagers within a half kilometre radius, it is in poor condition to say the least. There used to be a gym inside, but all the gym equipment got stolen or broken. And someone managed to rip off the blades of the ceiling fan, 4 metres off the ground. The spa is always filled with piss, the steam machine in the sauna is filled with piss, and the toilets are generally overflowing with piss. The taps haven't worked in years, and last weekend I noticed they replaced the taps. Uh oh.
Fortunately the female bathroom is in very good condition, so on a late night I would use that one. However when other people are at the pool, I must harden my resolve and force myself to have a quick shower in a doorless, windowless, tap handle-missing, shower head-broken shower stall. Years ago the council installed metal bars over the windows to prevent people breaking in. Crowbars were a simple answer to that obstacle. Nowadays, I'm just happy I leave the swimming pool with no STDs.
Although I haven't raged much on our maths teacher, I think we all know what Haunter evolves into. The other day I attempted to get a bookmark, and he spent 20 minutes marking my questions one at a time. One example was where I got the answer of 6.46 something and he got 6.40. This led to him redoing the question and his answer was I quote "You forgot to multiply by two". How the- what the- argh fuck it. I taught him where he went wrong and we moved on. But seriously, I am so screwed for next year. If only an unfortunate accident happened...
So ends another troublesome week of work and play. Everyone is probably stressed with everything but "You can do it!~" Piece out, and I'll leave you with another great lesson from the one and only:
"Stress makes you bald, but it's stressful to avoid stress, so you end up stressed out anyway, so in the end there's nothing you can do." -Sakata Gintoki
Friday, October 29, 2010
Anime and her again
A wise man once said...nothing. It is better to remain silent and have people think you are stupid, than to speak and remove all doubt.
Unfortunately for me, I spoke.
One of my foolishisms included my ignorance of the best thing in the universe. I recently read up the background and history of Gintama. Some new facts I've learned:
• Edo is actually Tokyo
• Gintama is set in the 1880’s
• Gintoki was originally part of the Shinsengumi until editing changed his character
• Gintama was originally about the Shinsengumi until editing changed the plot
Another anime related fact I just found out is that Kintaro loosely translates to 'golden boy'. My own ignorance of facts amazes and surprises me to no end.
'Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance.' ~Confucius
(Oh, and here's a little anime I found http://myanimelist.net/anime.php?id=7625. Loud out ye shall laugh when you see the title.)
Anyways, the other day I had no pillows. How did this come about you may ask? Well guess who's fault it was again. Correctly you have guessed young apprentice, twas that noob. So my mum has this weird/annoying habit of hanging all the bed related stuff out in the backyard on weekends. It is supposedly meant to 'air' them out. Normally there will be some dust or dirt if it's windy and once in a while some shit of bird. However the other day the weather was bipolar, and decided to storm right after we went shopping. It resulted in all my bedsheets, doona covers and pillows being soaked. Have you ever tried drying a fucking pillow? It's literally like shaking a wet sponge around.
But of all her oddities and retardisms, this one surprised me the most, the fact that she congratulated me on my report. Did she not see the ranks or marks? Maybe I should tell her I'm taking illicit drugs, have got a huge gambling debt, am alcoholic and is expecting child. I've singled the list down to shrooms and angel dust, list being "Things my mum has taken to make her so optimistic." The only other possibility is that miracles can happen. To test this theory, I expect a certain English faculty to explode by Monday, fingers crossed.
Many good and bad things happened in my life in the past couple of days, and as a wise man once said, "When life gives you lemons sell them on ebay." Take advantage of what you have been given, and fulfil it's maximum potential. As the great Gintoki said:
Unfortunately for me, I spoke.
One of my foolishisms included my ignorance of the best thing in the universe. I recently read up the background and history of Gintama. Some new facts I've learned:
• Edo is actually Tokyo
• Gintama is set in the 1880’s
• Gintoki was originally part of the Shinsengumi until editing changed his character
• Gintama was originally about the Shinsengumi until editing changed the plot
Another anime related fact I just found out is that Kintaro loosely translates to 'golden boy'. My own ignorance of facts amazes and surprises me to no end.
'Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance.' ~Confucius
(Oh, and here's a little anime I found http://myanimelist.net/anime.php?id=7625. Loud out ye shall laugh when you see the title.)
Anyways, the other day I had no pillows. How did this come about you may ask? Well guess who's fault it was again. Correctly you have guessed young apprentice, twas that noob. So my mum has this weird/annoying habit of hanging all the bed related stuff out in the backyard on weekends. It is supposedly meant to 'air' them out. Normally there will be some dust or dirt if it's windy and once in a while some shit of bird. However the other day the weather was bipolar, and decided to storm right after we went shopping. It resulted in all my bedsheets, doona covers and pillows being soaked. Have you ever tried drying a fucking pillow? It's literally like shaking a wet sponge around.
But of all her oddities and retardisms, this one surprised me the most, the fact that she congratulated me on my report. Did she not see the ranks or marks? Maybe I should tell her I'm taking illicit drugs, have got a huge gambling debt, am alcoholic and is expecting child. I've singled the list down to shrooms and angel dust, list being "Things my mum has taken to make her so optimistic." The only other possibility is that miracles can happen. To test this theory, I expect a certain English faculty to explode by Monday, fingers crossed.
Many good and bad things happened in my life in the past couple of days, and as a wise man once said, "When life gives you lemons sell them on ebay." Take advantage of what you have been given, and fulfil it's maximum potential. As the great Gintoki said:
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Life in year 12 and Creativity
So the other day I went to the doctor's because my grandma is sick, so we went as a family (yes, I know that's random). On the way in my mum tried opening one of the two doors and realised it was locked so she used the other one. The most obvious and probably deliberate clue would be that there was a sandbag behind the locked door. As we sat there waiting in line, 6 of the 8 people who entered used the wrong door. Seriously, take notice of your environment next time you use your eyes.
Which reminds me of a time when I forgot to wear my glasses to school. This was of course back in the early years of high school when I could still see. But of course as the day went on, I realised I relied kwite heavily on my sight. Last year upon reception of my driving license, I was told to wear glasses whenever I drive. It is the ekwivalent of telling everyone else to remember to open their eyes. A bit unnecessary.
Recently I've been playing AlienSwarm and Team Fortress 2, both of which have their fair share of newbs. However the other day, some five year old on AlienSwarm acted all high and mighty by telling us all through his microphone that he was the most important player in the team because he was the medic. However he was not the only medic, nor was he a good one (someone I know was the other medic), and it was his job to heal us, not the other way around. To prevent further nubbery, I have paid for a microphone with which I shall tell off retards and toddlers when they attempt to act as if they've hit puberty.
For those who haven't seen it, here is the link to a video I made : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VpDGmJBHmlQ. It contains the misheard lyrics of a Children of Bodom song. Interesting fact: someone from Finland watched my video, what a surprise. (Excuse my shameless plugging of my video).
And to the highlight of this blog! Stoning in year 12! Not sure if this occurs often, but recently I have witnessed some hardcore stoning. Today in maths for example, a conversation went something like this:
Mr. X: What's the tenth month called again?
Me: LOLOLOL HAHAHAHAHAHA OH MY GOD HAHAHAHA!
Mr. Y:STONER!
Mr. X: No seriously, was it October?
Me: Dude, octopus, octagon, October?
Mr. X: Soooo, it's December then?
Me: *facepalm*
Mr. Y: *facepalm*
Something that Mr. Y witnessed was:
*Mr. Y is drawing a tornado shaped scribble*
Ms. Z: That looks like a torpedo!
Mr. Y: Torpedo?
Ms. Z: Yeah, you know, like a hurricane?
I think we are all getting a bit screwed over by the stress. Lets just take a breath and find some time to relax, or we might forget the year or our name next. Be creative and come up with something new, maybe start a blog in your spare time. I will leave you with the words of the great teacher Sakata Gintoki.
For a pregnant woman to give birth, she's gotta feel the pain of pulling a watermelon out of her nostril. For an artist to create a piece, he's gotta feel the pain of pulling entire galaxies out of his ass~
Which reminds me of a time when I forgot to wear my glasses to school. This was of course back in the early years of high school when I could still see. But of course as the day went on, I realised I relied kwite heavily on my sight. Last year upon reception of my driving license, I was told to wear glasses whenever I drive. It is the ekwivalent of telling everyone else to remember to open their eyes. A bit unnecessary.
Recently I've been playing AlienSwarm and Team Fortress 2, both of which have their fair share of newbs. However the other day, some five year old on AlienSwarm acted all high and mighty by telling us all through his microphone that he was the most important player in the team because he was the medic. However he was not the only medic, nor was he a good one (someone I know was the other medic), and it was his job to heal us, not the other way around. To prevent further nubbery, I have paid for a microphone with which I shall tell off retards and toddlers when they attempt to act as if they've hit puberty.
For those who haven't seen it, here is the link to a video I made : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VpDGmJBHmlQ. It contains the misheard lyrics of a Children of Bodom song. Interesting fact: someone from Finland watched my video, what a surprise. (Excuse my shameless plugging of my video).
And to the highlight of this blog! Stoning in year 12! Not sure if this occurs often, but recently I have witnessed some hardcore stoning. Today in maths for example, a conversation went something like this:
Mr. X: What's the tenth month called again?
Me: LOLOLOL HAHAHAHAHAHA OH MY GOD HAHAHAHA!
Mr. Y:STONER!
Mr. X: No seriously, was it October?
Me: Dude, octopus, octagon, October?
Mr. X: Soooo, it's December then?
Me: *facepalm*
Mr. Y: *facepalm*
Something that Mr. Y witnessed was:
*Mr. Y is drawing a tornado shaped scribble*
Ms. Z: That looks like a torpedo!
Mr. Y: Torpedo?
Ms. Z: Yeah, you know, like a hurricane?
I think we are all getting a bit screwed over by the stress. Lets just take a breath and find some time to relax, or we might forget the year or our name next. Be creative and come up with something new, maybe start a blog in your spare time. I will leave you with the words of the great teacher Sakata Gintoki.
For a pregnant woman to give birth, she's gotta feel the pain of pulling a watermelon out of her nostril. For an artist to create a piece, he's gotta feel the pain of pulling entire galaxies out of his ass~
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Skool, phone numbers and family
So on Monday I had to redo the 3-Unit exam since I failed the prelims miserably. Knowing in my head there was no chance I would pass I didn’t bother studying and accepted my fate. To my surprise, the test was shockingly easy, and a pass is almost certain. However my brain did not decide to work during the test, so passing has not yet been confirmed. One example of my stonering is when I worked out two sides of a right angled triangle and I was stuck on how to figure out the 3rd side. STONED.
A newspaper headline I caught a glimpse of the other day, spoke of a change to the phone number ‘000’. I saw it and thought, ‘how fucking dumb does a bogan have to be, to forgot 000’. The only easier numbers would be 00 and 0. Which leads me to an overheard during the bus back from tennis. Some kid in year 9 sitting in front of me asked his friend “was it always nine one one, or did they change the number after the nine eleven bombings?” Seriously. This dumbass is in Ruse, in the second decade of the century. What a jewfaggot (best word I have heard this week).
For the people who know me or read my blog, ye shall knowst of the person I am about to talk about. This person recently found a new job, but instead of telling their co-workers, this person decided to say he/she was sick and couldn’t work any further, and so was given a celebratory party and many get-well-soon cards. What a dog. The other day this same person told me to go have a shower. Upon completion, they complained that they had to wait 5 minutes for a shower, and I should stop wasting other people’s time. Seriously, I just want to fucking asda;kjfsdfhasd .
Last item of the day, we got our reports back. My best percentile being 10, I have started looking on ebay for that gun with which my massacre will be used for, ending of course in a police shootout ultimately with my suicide.
If you have time to think of a beautiful end, then live beautifully until the end- Sakata Gintoki
A newspaper headline I caught a glimpse of the other day, spoke of a change to the phone number ‘000’. I saw it and thought, ‘how fucking dumb does a bogan have to be, to forgot 000’. The only easier numbers would be 00 and 0. Which leads me to an overheard during the bus back from tennis. Some kid in year 9 sitting in front of me asked his friend “was it always nine one one, or did they change the number after the nine eleven bombings?” Seriously. This dumbass is in Ruse, in the second decade of the century. What a jewfaggot (best word I have heard this week).
For the people who know me or read my blog, ye shall knowst of the person I am about to talk about. This person recently found a new job, but instead of telling their co-workers, this person decided to say he/she was sick and couldn’t work any further, and so was given a celebratory party and many get-well-soon cards. What a dog. The other day this same person told me to go have a shower. Upon completion, they complained that they had to wait 5 minutes for a shower, and I should stop wasting other people’s time. Seriously, I just want to fucking asda;kjfsdfhasd .
Last item of the day, we got our reports back. My best percentile being 10, I have started looking on ebay for that gun with which my massacre will be used for, ending of course in a police shootout ultimately with my suicide.
If you have time to think of a beautiful end, then live beautifully until the end- Sakata Gintoki
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Expectations and women
So recently KFC released a 'Fiery' burger which is meant to be ridiculously spicy, and loving spicy food I went to try it out. What a let down. The wicked wings were way hotter than the 'Fiery' chicken. Feels like money wasted. But on to more important things, year 12 has started =D. The year of hell as many who have come before us call it. But the first week has not been that bad. No pressure at all so far which is great, but ATAR estimates have come out and I don't think anyone is looking forward to their interview. Expectations are going to be let down often in the next 12 months, let's just hope there aren't too many group suicides.
Onto the other subject of the week, I am once again pissed off by the other gender. They have an ability to win any argument using a special skill. This skill allows them ignore logic, reality and defies sense-making in all its glory. E.g. Today I was parking my car, while my mum spotted. She stood in front of the car telling me to "turn towards her", and the argument went something like this:
"Turn towards me."
"Do you mean left or right? I can't turn forwards."
"Are you retarded? Just turn here!" (while waving hand wildly).
"How the hell do I do that? Explain what you want me to do!!!!"
"Seriously, you are too stupid to drive."
What the hell, how the fuckface do I turn forwards?! Now onto my retarded sister. Today I saw her playing with a padlock, just patting it, like a cat playing with a ball of wool. She had such a happy expression like this was what her ambitions and dreams were all about. So I thought to myself, if I told someone "hey, can you call the police? I think this retarded girl got lost." I bet they would totally believe me.
Later when we were shopping, my mum and sister just 'drifted' into a shoe shop and started staring at shoes. Being bored as hell I noticed a guy nodding and smiling at his girlfriend as she showed off shoes she liked (I assumed that was what they were doing). And the second she turned away, he stopped smiling and looked like he was about to kill himself.
Oh well, as long as I get laid, women are fine. But seriously sometimes my mum pisses me off so much, I want to do this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yTbBD0aQzUU
Hopefully we can all supress our rage over the many problems we come across throughout our lives. And in the words of the great Sakata Gintoki, "JUST DO IT~!"
Onto the other subject of the week, I am once again pissed off by the other gender. They have an ability to win any argument using a special skill. This skill allows them ignore logic, reality and defies sense-making in all its glory. E.g. Today I was parking my car, while my mum spotted. She stood in front of the car telling me to "turn towards her", and the argument went something like this:
"Turn towards me."
"Do you mean left or right? I can't turn forwards."
"Are you retarded? Just turn here!" (while waving hand wildly).
"How the hell do I do that? Explain what you want me to do!!!!"
"Seriously, you are too stupid to drive."
What the hell, how the fuckface do I turn forwards?! Now onto my retarded sister. Today I saw her playing with a padlock, just patting it, like a cat playing with a ball of wool. She had such a happy expression like this was what her ambitions and dreams were all about. So I thought to myself, if I told someone "hey, can you call the police? I think this retarded girl got lost." I bet they would totally believe me.
Later when we were shopping, my mum and sister just 'drifted' into a shoe shop and started staring at shoes. Being bored as hell I noticed a guy nodding and smiling at his girlfriend as she showed off shoes she liked (I assumed that was what they were doing). And the second she turned away, he stopped smiling and looked like he was about to kill himself.
Oh well, as long as I get laid, women are fine. But seriously sometimes my mum pisses me off so much, I want to do this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yTbBD0aQzUU
Hopefully we can all supress our rage over the many problems we come across throughout our lives. And in the words of the great Sakata Gintoki, "JUST DO IT~!"
Sunday, October 10, 2010
ANIMEEEEEEEE
Since year 12 is about to begin, I probably won't be able to watch much anime if any. So I thought back to all those hours I wasted/spent on animated entertainment. The year was 2006 and I was playing Narutimate Hero 3 at my friend's house. Upon seeing the awesome ninjaness of the orange jumpsuit clad dumbass, I decided I had to watch Naruto, and so my adventure began.
Deathnote, Bleach and FullMetal Panic followed in that order later in 2006, before a few more anime were touched but left alone throughout 2007 and'08. Then in the fateful year of 2009, I became an animaniac. Upon finding dignaruto.com in April, I explored more to discover animeseason.com, which I use to this day to stream anime.
Soul Eater was completed in 3.5 days, Code Geass was paused because I got capped, and I became addicted. March 2010, I came upon myanimelist.net. Hours later, the short list of completions was added, but I wanted more. By June, my hard drive was stocked with unwatched anime, but I didn't stop there, only starting more series. Now in October 2010, my list has reached a big milestone. The 100th anime has been completed. I wonder if it's a sign that the date is 10-10-10.
Nearing the 100, I thought it would be fitting to watch something good. Unfortunately due to poor scheduling I ended up needing another two so I decided to watch Howl's Moving Castle and Spirited Away, both great films from what I've heard.
Howl's Moving Castle was quite different from what I've seen, seemingly more of a British cartoon and without much action. However there are some interesting characters and a decent, albeit boring, plot.
The next film Spirited Away was filmed 3 years prior to Howl's Moving Castle, and the numerous similarities are very obvious. The main character is a young shy girl, someone gets transformed into something and needs the help of a young man.
This young man can turn into a flying beast, and they share an almost romantic relationship throughout the film. That pretty much sums up the two films. The resolutions to the plots are both quite boring and there isn't any complications during the film.
The one thing which can't be denied are the funny,cute and unbelievably imaginative characters in these films. Without watching other Hayao Miyazaki films I can't be certain, but the characters he has made here are amazing.
From the highs of Gintama and FLCL to the lows of Aoi Bungaku Series and Petit Eva: Evangelion@School, anime has been a huge part of my life, despite all parents calling it 'cartoons'. So looking at my past, here are my top animes:
1. Gintama- For the outrageous and endless hilarity, not to mention the best set of characters.
2. FLCL- Cool art and the best OST ever, coupled with comedy and a great plot.
3. Toppen Tengen Gurren Lagann- Some of the insanest and most outrageous action scenes coupled with the manliest Kamina produces something beyond 'epic'.
4. Detroit Metal City- Utterly random and funny scenarios with some decent music, sure to make you LOL.
5. Soul Eater- Looking past the horrible ending, the humour made this a shonen anime above the rest.
6. Golden Boy- Surprisingly only the least ecchi chapters of the manga were animated, but created some hilarious sexual scenarios with an awesome protagonist.
Some other recommendations must go to Toradora! (great characters and plot), Angel Beats (memorable characters), the FullMetal Panic series (awesome action and comedy) and the Dragonball series (for all the fun schoolyard battles). Hope Gintama comes back soon!
Deathnote, Bleach and FullMetal Panic followed in that order later in 2006, before a few more anime were touched but left alone throughout 2007 and'08. Then in the fateful year of 2009, I became an animaniac. Upon finding dignaruto.com in April, I explored more to discover animeseason.com, which I use to this day to stream anime.
Soul Eater was completed in 3.5 days, Code Geass was paused because I got capped, and I became addicted. March 2010, I came upon myanimelist.net. Hours later, the short list of completions was added, but I wanted more. By June, my hard drive was stocked with unwatched anime, but I didn't stop there, only starting more series. Now in October 2010, my list has reached a big milestone. The 100th anime has been completed. I wonder if it's a sign that the date is 10-10-10.
Nearing the 100, I thought it would be fitting to watch something good. Unfortunately due to poor scheduling I ended up needing another two so I decided to watch Howl's Moving Castle and Spirited Away, both great films from what I've heard.
Howl's Moving Castle was quite different from what I've seen, seemingly more of a British cartoon and without much action. However there are some interesting characters and a decent, albeit boring, plot.
The next film Spirited Away was filmed 3 years prior to Howl's Moving Castle, and the numerous similarities are very obvious. The main character is a young shy girl, someone gets transformed into something and needs the help of a young man.
This young man can turn into a flying beast, and they share an almost romantic relationship throughout the film. That pretty much sums up the two films. The resolutions to the plots are both quite boring and there isn't any complications during the film.
The one thing which can't be denied are the funny,cute and unbelievably imaginative characters in these films. Without watching other Hayao Miyazaki films I can't be certain, but the characters he has made here are amazing.
From the highs of Gintama and FLCL to the lows of Aoi Bungaku Series and Petit Eva: Evangelion@School, anime has been a huge part of my life, despite all parents calling it 'cartoons'. So looking at my past, here are my top animes:
1. Gintama- For the outrageous and endless hilarity, not to mention the best set of characters.
2. FLCL- Cool art and the best OST ever, coupled with comedy and a great plot.
3. Toppen Tengen Gurren Lagann- Some of the insanest and most outrageous action scenes coupled with the manliest Kamina produces something beyond 'epic'.
4. Detroit Metal City- Utterly random and funny scenarios with some decent music, sure to make you LOL.
5. Soul Eater- Looking past the horrible ending, the humour made this a shonen anime above the rest.
6. Golden Boy- Surprisingly only the least ecchi chapters of the manga were animated, but created some hilarious sexual scenarios with an awesome protagonist.
Some other recommendations must go to Toradora! (great characters and plot), Angel Beats (memorable characters), the FullMetal Panic series (awesome action and comedy) and the Dragonball series (for all the fun schoolyard battles). Hope Gintama comes back soon!
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Bloopers and family
Throughout the history of film and television there has been countless mistakes made on screen. Some famous ones include the wristwatch which can be glimpsed in the film Hero, and the car in the background of Lord of the Rings: the Fellowship of the Ring. Recently I've been watching Chuck which is an American TV series for those who don't know. In one episode Chuck notices a scrunched up $100 bill lying on the ground, when he picks it up, it is brand new and has no crinkle lines. Another episode some guy is drinking a martini with two olives lying in it. The camera swings away for no more than 2 seconds and the olives are now impaled on a toothpick in his hand. Can't people edit stuff before they show it? It's not much of a problem but it just shows nubcakery and unprofessionalism.
Again I must complain about my family. My grandma has been cooking for many years, but the other day she cooked the same type of fish she has made many times before, way too long. So long, the surface of the fish looked like it had smegma on it. I shit you not. It was horrifying to eat. Onto other food related retardations, my mum has been buying and eating almonds for the last 5 years at the least. She is a health freak so a wide variety of nuts are always present in the kitchen. During our shopping trip today, my sister exclaimed in surprise upon discovery of almonds. She had never known what almonds were. How is that possible you ask? No, she does not have Downs Syndrome. It is just a mystery of the universe.
Gintama quote of the day:
"Do you want to be Otsu-chan's fan club? Are you willing to put up with any ordeal for the sake of becoming Otsu-chan's official fan club? Are you willing to go anywhere for Otsu-chan, whether it's into fire or water?"
"Would you be able to eat Otsu-chan's shit?"
Again I must complain about my family. My grandma has been cooking for many years, but the other day she cooked the same type of fish she has made many times before, way too long. So long, the surface of the fish looked like it had smegma on it. I shit you not. It was horrifying to eat. Onto other food related retardations, my mum has been buying and eating almonds for the last 5 years at the least. She is a health freak so a wide variety of nuts are always present in the kitchen. During our shopping trip today, my sister exclaimed in surprise upon discovery of almonds. She had never known what almonds were. How is that possible you ask? No, she does not have Downs Syndrome. It is just a mystery of the universe.
Gintama quote of the day:
"Do you want to be Otsu-chan's fan club? Are you willing to put up with any ordeal for the sake of becoming Otsu-chan's official fan club? Are you willing to go anywhere for Otsu-chan, whether it's into fire or water?"
"Would you be able to eat Otsu-chan's shit?"
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Holidays
This has been a rather enjoyable holiday so far and I hope the school term will be good as well. However not everything is perfect. I've always known that the laundry is by far the dirtiest room in my house, and it was only recently that I thought 'isn't that where clothes are meant to be cleaned?'. Now when I say dirtiest, I mean there is so much dust in the corners of the room, there could be something under the dust and I wouldn't know. It's so dark too since the designers of the house thought it would be funny if the door opened in such a way it blocks all light. What's even more dumb is that the vacuum cleaner is in there. Every time I vacuum I hate the process of feeling around in the dust for a tool which is designed to clean the damn dust.
Now onto something called karma. Many people believe in the system that what goes around comes around. However I believe that karma likes to fuck around sometimes. The other day I went for a jog and saw an old man sitting on the path. I hoped he wasn't injured or anything because I wasn't in the mood to help him out. Yes I'm an asshole, sue me. But he asked me to, so I helped him stand up and walked him to his house. It was afterward that I felt a sense of goodness in me. As if I'd done something deserved of praise. Now if karma is true this will allow me to gain something good. But if karma works properly, technically if I did something really faggy it should even out right?
Although it has been almost 2 weeks, I've just remembered Gengiah's amazing physical achievements. He ran the 90km ultramarathon a total of 9 times, with a best time of about 8 hours. And when questioned on why he doesn't run the CitytoSurf, it's because foofty dollars is a waste to go for a short jog, since he runs up to 20km every Sunday. These achievements were brought to mind as I watched the Commonwealth Games. There was a 15 year old girl who won gold in gymnastics, and a 62kg dude who lifted 156kg to win gold in weightlifting. Sitting here I realise I'm over 15 and over 62kg and haven't done shit. I don't think I can even drive 90km without getting tired. So I guess I'm trying to say, we should all try harder and achieve some- You know what, fuck it. I'm going to go watch some anime.
My own joke:
What did the joker say to Harry Potter after his godfather died?
Why so Sirius?
HAHAHAHAHA lame.
Now onto something called karma. Many people believe in the system that what goes around comes around. However I believe that karma likes to fuck around sometimes. The other day I went for a jog and saw an old man sitting on the path. I hoped he wasn't injured or anything because I wasn't in the mood to help him out. Yes I'm an asshole, sue me. But he asked me to, so I helped him stand up and walked him to his house. It was afterward that I felt a sense of goodness in me. As if I'd done something deserved of praise. Now if karma is true this will allow me to gain something good. But if karma works properly, technically if I did something really faggy it should even out right?
Although it has been almost 2 weeks, I've just remembered Gengiah's amazing physical achievements. He ran the 90km ultramarathon a total of 9 times, with a best time of about 8 hours. And when questioned on why he doesn't run the CitytoSurf, it's because foofty dollars is a waste to go for a short jog, since he runs up to 20km every Sunday. These achievements were brought to mind as I watched the Commonwealth Games. There was a 15 year old girl who won gold in gymnastics, and a 62kg dude who lifted 156kg to win gold in weightlifting. Sitting here I realise I'm over 15 and over 62kg and haven't done shit. I don't think I can even drive 90km without getting tired. So I guess I'm trying to say, we should all try harder and achieve some- You know what, fuck it. I'm going to go watch some anime.
My own joke:
What did the joker say to Harry Potter after his godfather died?
Why so Sirius?
HAHAHAHAHA lame.
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Edwin's house and Dragonball
Recently I started watching Dragonball and I’m so hooked, despite watching it in English. The funniest thing is that they couldn’t hire the right actors to voice the characters. For example, Bulma has a normal American accent, but her dad has a British accent and her mom has a southern drawl, even though they live in something resembling Japan. The most hilarious voice however, must go to Commander Red, who is Scottish. Half way through an arc his voice changed into an American accent. Later on in the arc, halfway through a sentence it turned Scottish again. How fricken poor were the producers.
So on Tuesday a lot of people gathered at Edwin’s house and thanks to Edwin for organising such an awesome day. Not sure about most people but I had the best travel experience on the way there. First I waited on the wrong side of the road for the 521, and watched it drive away on the other side. So I ran to the next suburb to catch the M52. I expected to get off at West Ryde station and catch a train from there, but I was so smart I got off on the wrong stop, leading to about 10 minutes of exploring the back streets of West Ryde looking for the station. Upon arrival, I saw a train arriving, and it was going to Epping which was my destination, so I hopped on. Only to realise the next stop was Denistone, meaning I was going the wrong way. So being a genius such as I, I quickly jumped onto Denistone station to wait for a train going back to West Ryde, only to realise that was the right train I just got off. After a gaming marathon which really deserves the name 'marathon', I left at 11am the next day, 26 hours without sleeping. On the way home I was buying a ticket from Cheltenham station and since I’m so clever, I didn’t realise the machine clearly said ‘No Coins’, and looked very smart in front of a line of people trying to shove coins into the blocked slot. Finally sleep took over at 1pm.
Anyway I just can't say how awesome the day/night at Edwin's house was. Thanks again =). And now some quotes:
"Why are you under me?"
"That's what she said"
"Why are you on top of me?"
"That's what she said"
"Fuck you, you motherbitch!"
"Let's go kill some bitches!" <--(My favourite)
Long live Oddball.
So on Tuesday a lot of people gathered at Edwin’s house and thanks to Edwin for organising such an awesome day. Not sure about most people but I had the best travel experience on the way there. First I waited on the wrong side of the road for the 521, and watched it drive away on the other side. So I ran to the next suburb to catch the M52. I expected to get off at West Ryde station and catch a train from there, but I was so smart I got off on the wrong stop, leading to about 10 minutes of exploring the back streets of West Ryde looking for the station. Upon arrival, I saw a train arriving, and it was going to Epping which was my destination, so I hopped on. Only to realise the next stop was Denistone, meaning I was going the wrong way. So being a genius such as I, I quickly jumped onto Denistone station to wait for a train going back to West Ryde, only to realise that was the right train I just got off. After a gaming marathon which really deserves the name 'marathon', I left at 11am the next day, 26 hours without sleeping. On the way home I was buying a ticket from Cheltenham station and since I’m so clever, I didn’t realise the machine clearly said ‘No Coins’, and looked very smart in front of a line of people trying to shove coins into the blocked slot. Finally sleep took over at 1pm.
Anyway I just can't say how awesome the day/night at Edwin's house was. Thanks again =). And now some quotes:
"Why are you under me?"
"That's what she said"
"Why are you on top of me?"
"That's what she said"
"Fuck you, you motherbitch!"
"Let's go kill some bitches!" <--(My favourite)
Long live Oddball.
Monday, September 27, 2010
Parental advice and other stuffz
Since my sister is growing up, my mum decided to lecture her on marriage and relationships. The example she used is of a white woman who married the man she loved, however he was a total loser in terms of academic and financial success and they can barely pay the rent. However they are happy because they've been in love for many years and I think they have 4 children (didn't hear properly). Apparently this is very stupid and typical of a white person. Any one with a brain would marry for money and success, love will only drag you down. As if my sister wasn't already screwed up enough now she will be single all her life too.
Something else that everyone probably heard from their Asian parents are ridiculous exaggerations of failure. For example, my mum's always told me if I don't get 90 something UAI/ATAR, I would become a janitor. She spent so many hours of my life tutoring me on what a janitor does every day. Another promise she made is that if I do not get a job soon, I will become a hobo. This is because no one will employ an 18 year old who doesn't have at least 2 years of work experience. And I thought to myself: that's logical. It explains all the hobos on the streets. I mean Africa has like 1 billion of them, very, very logical.
Something totally random the other day happened. When I was at Borders reading manga for free, the speakers suddenly played this song: Top Song Looking around I don't think anyone else realised we so just got rickrolled.
Something else that's pretty random which I noticed on TV. Most people have probably seen the Coco Pops add, where the slogan is "Like a milkshake, only crunchy!". Not to be picky, but isn't that like, I don't know, not a milkshake? Now I'm not an expert on milkshakes, but I have a feeling they are of the liquid persuasion. Which brings me to something else which is rather interesting. Why do Americans call petrol gas? Petrol is a liquid. Is it just the average American who does so? If I went up to an American chemist, I wonder what he would call it?
I thought I'd finish off with my belonging pic for our speech. Comment please!
Something else that everyone probably heard from their Asian parents are ridiculous exaggerations of failure. For example, my mum's always told me if I don't get 90 something UAI/ATAR, I would become a janitor. She spent so many hours of my life tutoring me on what a janitor does every day. Another promise she made is that if I do not get a job soon, I will become a hobo. This is because no one will employ an 18 year old who doesn't have at least 2 years of work experience. And I thought to myself: that's logical. It explains all the hobos on the streets. I mean Africa has like 1 billion of them, very, very logical.
Something totally random the other day happened. When I was at Borders reading manga for free, the speakers suddenly played this song: Top Song Looking around I don't think anyone else realised we so just got rickrolled.
Something else that's pretty random which I noticed on TV. Most people have probably seen the Coco Pops add, where the slogan is "Like a milkshake, only crunchy!". Not to be picky, but isn't that like, I don't know, not a milkshake? Now I'm not an expert on milkshakes, but I have a feeling they are of the liquid persuasion. Which brings me to something else which is rather interesting. Why do Americans call petrol gas? Petrol is a liquid. Is it just the average American who does so? If I went up to an American chemist, I wonder what he would call it?
I thought I'd finish off with my belonging pic for our speech. Comment please!
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
I hate sisters
So my sister got the overpriced braces and we went out for the lunch on the weekend. She soon found out nothing was bitable nor chewable with braces. So since she couldn't eat, she decided to screw up everyone else's lunch. My mum ordered 2 mango pancakes, which are pancakes filled with cream. My sister ripped apart the pancakes, ate the cream inside and left the raped carcass of the pancakes on her plate. Then at dinner, my grandma made fried meat buns, (can't describe it properly), and we all just grabbed one off the main plate in the middle. My sister wouldn't eat because she didn't have her own plate. The fuck? Is she five? Last night she wouldn't eat chicken wings because it was too hard to bite the chicken, so my mum had to rip the chicken into small swallowable pieces. My mum is constantly telling me how mature my sister is and how I should be like her. FML.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
My family and the apocalypse
My sister recently decided to get braces. Now her teeth are a bit out of line, but aren't very noticeable unless you're a dentist doing a check-up. However, she is spoilt, so she wants my mum to get her cosmetic dental surgery, costing almost $5000. What the fuck. But my mum isn't so good a person either. The other day I heard her talking to my sister about a mentally challenged guy, and she said he should have been aborted. She also thinks black people shouldn't come to Australia because they're all African refugees spending her tax money. Once she wouldn't shop in a store because the person at the counter looked middle eastern. I live with some seriously screwed up people.
Onto some lighter stuff, the other day I was watching Man vs. Wild, when I saw Bear eat raw sheep balls. He ate it because someone offered it to him and it would be rude to decline. No it fucking isn't. If someone gave me a penis burger I will not eat that shit. What a British douche.
I recently checked the most views videos on Youtube. Justin Bieber is #1. 2012? I think the Mayans were off by a few years. Clearly if Bieber has topped the list we are all fucked. So badly. I've even been seeing people posting comments on random videos trying to get other videos to top Bieber. But at 311 million views, he is almost 40 million ahead of Lady Gaga, who is only slightly better as the Youtube leader. Where has all the rock gone?
As of 6th September 2010 none of the top ten videos are rock music videos. In the list are also 2 Miley Cyrus videos. Surely that signifies humankind's failure as a species. Is this the apocalypse?
"It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)"- R.E.M.
Onto some lighter stuff, the other day I was watching Man vs. Wild, when I saw Bear eat raw sheep balls. He ate it because someone offered it to him and it would be rude to decline. No it fucking isn't. If someone gave me a penis burger I will not eat that shit. What a British douche.
I recently checked the most views videos on Youtube. Justin Bieber is #1. 2012? I think the Mayans were off by a few years. Clearly if Bieber has topped the list we are all fucked. So badly. I've even been seeing people posting comments on random videos trying to get other videos to top Bieber. But at 311 million views, he is almost 40 million ahead of Lady Gaga, who is only slightly better as the Youtube leader. Where has all the rock gone?
As of 6th September 2010 none of the top ten videos are rock music videos. In the list are also 2 Miley Cyrus videos. Surely that signifies humankind's failure as a species. Is this the apocalypse?
"It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)"- R.E.M.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Seekwels, treekwels and a flavorgasm
Last night my mum decided to have dinner at Star City Casino's restaurant. Because of her issues, I had to catch a bus to the city, while her and my sister took the car. It was an interesting ride, though. Bus travellers included a guy wearing a cape, a chick with no pants and a chick with drawn on eyebrows.
On arrival of the restaurant I saw a group of people in line that scared me shitless. About 7 or 8 guys who had their sideburns shaved, and mullets and arms covered in tattoos. It was like the Commancheros or something.
But finally dinner came and went, and in the words of Shaun Micallef: "And now we come, as we inevitably must, to the end game". For those who haven't eaten dinner before, there's this thing called dessert. Remembering my last trip there I reminisced of an awesome cherry cake and looked forward to it.
Unfortunately in Dessert 2: Dessertier (title of this trip), my cake was not there, so I made do. First was the toffee cake, which was average. Following was the ever present jelly. Again no surprises. Then out of the darkness rose the almond cake. 4 layers of sexy. Black forest was next. Staring at the chocolate I couldn't believe this could work. But oh it did! Next the banana cake helped the tastebuds calm down again before something amazing. Unable to find the name of this next cake I named it strawberry viagara, cos my tastebuds had a boner. Lastly was a rice/jellyish thing. The rice vomit tasted of rice with a pinch of vomit.
This was unsatisfactory. I likened my situation to Frodo's journey. Would Frodo be happy if some nigger orc took his ring right in front of Mt. Doom? I don't think so. But it was too bad, because I had already loosened my belt. Surely the game was over? But a twist to the tale! I decided to play extra time. Another lap of the buffet and I had gathered a shoddy éclair, a weak jelly, and some wannabe cheesecake. But these were all to set up my mouth for the coffee spider. At first I thought it was a chocolate fail. But after spilling some of the coffee on myself, I realised this was so much more. After tasting it, the coffee wasn't the only stains on me. Flavorgasm. Finally content that my day was done, I took a walk to allow the food to digest. Only to be horribly shocked. Another twist. A new dessert had been put out.
Could I take the risk? The day was complete, done, finished, I was content. But what if I missed out on something even better? I gambled. Picking up the 3 layered cup of sweetness, I ate a huge spoonful.
And I lost. What a fuck up! After the sexy coffee dessert, this tasted like anus. Utterly disgusted I sat and pondered where I'd gone wrong. Two epics in a row I have spent in that restaurant, two epics in which I tasted something amazing, only to end on something horrendous. I left the restaurant vowing that I would come back harder, better, faster and stronger.
Be ready for the treekwel: 'Dessert 3: The Flavorgasm strikes back'. It will be the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny.
Next time I will smell
On arrival of the restaurant I saw a group of people in line that scared me shitless. About 7 or 8 guys who had their sideburns shaved, and mullets and arms covered in tattoos. It was like the Commancheros or something.
But finally dinner came and went, and in the words of Shaun Micallef: "And now we come, as we inevitably must, to the end game". For those who haven't eaten dinner before, there's this thing called dessert. Remembering my last trip there I reminisced of an awesome cherry cake and looked forward to it.
Unfortunately in Dessert 2: Dessertier (title of this trip), my cake was not there, so I made do. First was the toffee cake, which was average. Following was the ever present jelly. Again no surprises. Then out of the darkness rose the almond cake. 4 layers of sexy. Black forest was next. Staring at the chocolate I couldn't believe this could work. But oh it did! Next the banana cake helped the tastebuds calm down again before something amazing. Unable to find the name of this next cake I named it strawberry viagara, cos my tastebuds had a boner. Lastly was a rice/jellyish thing. The rice vomit tasted of rice with a pinch of vomit.
This was unsatisfactory. I likened my situation to Frodo's journey. Would Frodo be happy if some nigger orc took his ring right in front of Mt. Doom? I don't think so. But it was too bad, because I had already loosened my belt. Surely the game was over? But a twist to the tale! I decided to play extra time. Another lap of the buffet and I had gathered a shoddy éclair, a weak jelly, and some wannabe cheesecake. But these were all to set up my mouth for the coffee spider. At first I thought it was a chocolate fail. But after spilling some of the coffee on myself, I realised this was so much more. After tasting it, the coffee wasn't the only stains on me. Flavorgasm. Finally content that my day was done, I took a walk to allow the food to digest. Only to be horribly shocked. Another twist. A new dessert had been put out.
Could I take the risk? The day was complete, done, finished, I was content. But what if I missed out on something even better? I gambled. Picking up the 3 layered cup of sweetness, I ate a huge spoonful.
And I lost. What a fuck up! After the sexy coffee dessert, this tasted like anus. Utterly disgusted I sat and pondered where I'd gone wrong. Two epics in a row I have spent in that restaurant, two epics in which I tasted something amazing, only to end on something horrendous. I left the restaurant vowing that I would come back harder, better, faster and stronger.
Be ready for the treekwel: 'Dessert 3: The Flavorgasm strikes back'. It will be the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny.
Next time I will smell
Sunday, September 5, 2010
9/11 and driving
So recently there's been the controversy over the mosque being built at ground zero. As a neutral standerby, I've got nothing against Muslims, but building a mosque at the sight of the 9/11 bombings is a bit like rubbing salt in the wounds. What I find ridiculously stupid, are the rallies planned. On the 11th of September 2010, there will be a rally to oppose the construction of the mosque. On the same day, there will be a rally to oppose the first rally. Fail.
Here's some news which is just unbelievable. For those who don't know, during the aftermath of the bombings, hundreds of people were stuck in the rubble, which meant rescuers had to run in and save people. This is a heroic but obvious act. But because of the rescuers heroism, many of them had to be treated due to injuries and many were compensated for their efforts. Obviously this had to come from the government. Now, August 2010, Congress (yes that's right, the USA again), has come up with the biggest bullshit I've ever heard. "They only thought of saving lives, and not of taxes" said one member, over the blame of the rescuers for costing tax payers' money. They are seriously blaming heroes for the rise in tax. On top of that, any hero who did not have US citizenship may be forced to give back whatever it cost to heal them and be forced to leave the country. Let's hope to god Congress gets bombed.
Finally, today I hit a bird with my car. I saw a brown ball fly onto the windshield from my right, before seeing some murky likwids being sprayed on the screen. I believe I hit the shit out of that bird, literally.
"If you kill yourself, I'll kill you" - Onizuka
Here's some news which is just unbelievable. For those who don't know, during the aftermath of the bombings, hundreds of people were stuck in the rubble, which meant rescuers had to run in and save people. This is a heroic but obvious act. But because of the rescuers heroism, many of them had to be treated due to injuries and many were compensated for their efforts. Obviously this had to come from the government. Now, August 2010, Congress (yes that's right, the USA again), has come up with the biggest bullshit I've ever heard. "They only thought of saving lives, and not of taxes" said one member, over the blame of the rescuers for costing tax payers' money. They are seriously blaming heroes for the rise in tax. On top of that, any hero who did not have US citizenship may be forced to give back whatever it cost to heal them and be forced to leave the country. Let's hope to god Congress gets bombed.
Finally, today I hit a bird with my car. I saw a brown ball fly onto the windshield from my right, before seeing some murky likwids being sprayed on the screen. I believe I hit the shit out of that bird, literally.
"If you kill yourself, I'll kill you" - Onizuka
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Exams, small things, Sean got owned, I'm retarded
CHYEEEAAAAAAAHHHHH BOY! 2 unit maths is over mofos! wootwoot!!!!11!!one!!1sin90!1
Ahem. Now that 3 exams are done with, the pressure is starting to let up. But chemistry and 3 unit maths exams are still to come, along with 3unit English speech. And before we know it, HSC will begin. This shit just doesn't end.
On to less important matters, the other day I was reading manga when my mum walked in. The next page loaded to reveal a sex scene and my mum just froze. Seriously, worst timing ever.
Something I read about which was typical of Americans was this: A suspicious package was found and immediately the SWAT team and bomb defusal skwad was called in. When the contents could not be ascertained, they concluded it was dangerous so decided to blow it up. If that wasn't genius enough, they checked what was in the package afterwards. Turns out it was filled with pamphlets on teaching people what to do when they find a suspicious package.
Hopefully Sean will never read this. On the way home we walked past the Chinese take-away shop that closes at 3pm (retards), and we saw it was open so we read the menu for fun (also retards). After a few jokes I bet him 2 bucks he couldn't buy a spring roll. The reason is they only sell 6 for $4.80. The ensuing haggling and persuasion by Sean to buy just 1 spring roll from the old Asian lady was indescribably funny. Revelling in others' misfortune is so fun.
I experienced the dumbest most retardededest thought the other day. When playing guitar I was only hitting about half the notes, but I was unsure the exact percentage. So in my mind I wondered: 'What if they made a guitar hero style game, but for guitars?'. Fuck me.
"Study, study, study, study!"- Kintaro
Ahem. Now that 3 exams are done with, the pressure is starting to let up. But chemistry and 3 unit maths exams are still to come, along with 3unit English speech. And before we know it, HSC will begin. This shit just doesn't end.
On to less important matters, the other day I was reading manga when my mum walked in. The next page loaded to reveal a sex scene and my mum just froze. Seriously, worst timing ever.
Something I read about which was typical of Americans was this: A suspicious package was found and immediately the SWAT team and bomb defusal skwad was called in. When the contents could not be ascertained, they concluded it was dangerous so decided to blow it up. If that wasn't genius enough, they checked what was in the package afterwards. Turns out it was filled with pamphlets on teaching people what to do when they find a suspicious package.
Hopefully Sean will never read this. On the way home we walked past the Chinese take-away shop that closes at 3pm (retards), and we saw it was open so we read the menu for fun (also retards). After a few jokes I bet him 2 bucks he couldn't buy a spring roll. The reason is they only sell 6 for $4.80. The ensuing haggling and persuasion by Sean to buy just 1 spring roll from the old Asian lady was indescribably funny. Revelling in others' misfortune is so fun.
I experienced the dumbest most retardededest thought the other day. When playing guitar I was only hitting about half the notes, but I was unsure the exact percentage. So in my mind I wondered: 'What if they made a guitar hero style game, but for guitars?'. Fuck me.
"Study, study, study, study!"- Kintaro
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Asian, women and cars
Recently I've noticed that there are some really cool phone numbers. An easily remembered one I saw recently was 9222 2222. 13 37 ?? was another one I saw, the last two digits being entirely insignificant. Now imagine a fob buys a house and gets the number 8888 8888. Eight 8s? He'll probably yell out "Fah tsai lah!" and come in his pants.
Onto something my mum did which severely pissed me off. She got spam mail telling her she could make 1000's of dollars a month with their amazing new bullshit. Despite my blatant attempts at persuading her otherwise, she decided it would be a good idea to send $200 to an offshore company. I'll spare the details of the scam, but say that my family is now a few trillion Zimbabwean dollars poorer.
This may surprise, but my mum is not only Asian and a woman but also drives a car! Being all of the above it is no surprise our car is royally fucked. Despite the fact the engine has had trouble starting for the last 2 months, my mum thought the car would survive til our next 6-monthly service. This has led to the engine being absolutely unable to initiate, and we must now jump start the car if we want to go anywhere. Time to call NRMA.
Live long and prosper~
Onto something my mum did which severely pissed me off. She got spam mail telling her she could make 1000's of dollars a month with their amazing new bullshit. Despite my blatant attempts at persuading her otherwise, she decided it would be a good idea to send $200 to an offshore company. I'll spare the details of the scam, but say that my family is now a few trillion Zimbabwean dollars poorer.
This may surprise, but my mum is not only Asian and a woman but also drives a car! Being all of the above it is no surprise our car is royally fucked. Despite the fact the engine has had trouble starting for the last 2 months, my mum thought the car would survive til our next 6-monthly service. This has led to the engine being absolutely unable to initiate, and we must now jump start the car if we want to go anywhere. Time to call NRMA.
Live long and prosper~
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Ikea, the Simpsons and 40 hour famine
On the weekend my mum made me go buy a table I don't want nor need. Apparently shoving a random table in my room wasn't enough, oh no; she really wants me miserable so we went to buy a table from Ikea. Ikea can be described quite simply. It is a maze which continually forces you to look at cheap but mostly useless stuff, while the only exit is one floor down and requires about half a kilometre of travel to reach. If you buy anything which you most likely will, you must then spend hours working out how to build it. Then to top it off, they sell extremely cheap hot dogs possibly made from the left over meat from other sausage factories. It is a hell maze and I was lucky to get out alive.
Onto more pressing matters, I have spent the last year or so analysing the Simpsons. Too much English classes? Maybe. But I've realised just how many political, social and sexual jokes the writers shove into each episode. I can quite confidently guarantee that in every episode there is at least 3 jokes which an 8 year old wouldn't and shouldn't understand. E.g. in the episode where Homer gives Marge paddle pop sticks to make models he says: "I've never been so happy to give you wood". I was utterly shocked at the Sickipedia-esque joke. But sometimes the writers also go the other way, when Homer parodised a quote from Casablanca, which is such a sophisticated form of comedy as compared to the previous joke. I wonder what other shows are brainwashing the children of tomorrow?
Finally I'd like to talk about an annoying thing about myself. I realised the other day that I swear way too much after a certain conversion:
Friend 1: You swear so much, do you have tourettes or something?
Me: F*ck no!
Friend 2: Hah! You just swore again
Me: Ah shit!
After such an outburst I wondered maybe I should not talk for the nearing 40 hour famine? Ah fuck it.
Onto more pressing matters, I have spent the last year or so analysing the Simpsons. Too much English classes? Maybe. But I've realised just how many political, social and sexual jokes the writers shove into each episode. I can quite confidently guarantee that in every episode there is at least 3 jokes which an 8 year old wouldn't and shouldn't understand. E.g. in the episode where Homer gives Marge paddle pop sticks to make models he says: "I've never been so happy to give you wood". I was utterly shocked at the Sickipedia-esque joke. But sometimes the writers also go the other way, when Homer parodised a quote from Casablanca, which is such a sophisticated form of comedy as compared to the previous joke. I wonder what other shows are brainwashing the children of tomorrow?
Finally I'd like to talk about an annoying thing about myself. I realised the other day that I swear way too much after a certain conversion:
Friend 1: You swear so much, do you have tourettes or something?
Me: F*ck no!
Friend 2: Hah! You just swore again
Me: Ah shit!
After such an outburst I wondered maybe I should not talk for the nearing 40 hour famine? Ah fuck it.
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Annoying siblings and religion
Most people have younger siblings, and all of them are annoying. My sister is 3 years younger, so she has had no function in my life (she's bad at computer games, sports, and follows exactly what other people say meaning she's got 0 opinions, ergo I can't discuss anything with her because I know the answer already). Anyway, recently she started playing the drums again, and has got some sort of retardation where she has to tap or smack things all day long. The car window, dinner bowls, walls, doors, tables etc. It's driving me nuts. To add to her annoyance, she got a little plastic whistle which she blows 1 hour a day. I have a feeling she'll be tapping and blowing many more things in years to come.
The issue of banning the burka has been discussed internationally, with some countries or states deciding to ban it. I do have a slight issue with the fact that it's a plain disguise. But what I'm more annoyed about is that only burkas are being targeted. I saw a fob the other day, but he couldn't see me. His hair covered half his face. Is that not a disguise I ask? I would feel much more comfortable if long fringes are banned, rather than a religious clothing, even if religion is total bullshit. So from now on I'm bringing scissors with me everywhere.
May the force be with you~
The issue of banning the burka has been discussed internationally, with some countries or states deciding to ban it. I do have a slight issue with the fact that it's a plain disguise. But what I'm more annoyed about is that only burkas are being targeted. I saw a fob the other day, but he couldn't see me. His hair covered half his face. Is that not a disguise I ask? I would feel much more comfortable if long fringes are banned, rather than a religious clothing, even if religion is total bullshit. So from now on I'm bringing scissors with me everywhere.
May the force be with you~
Thursday, August 5, 2010
All the small things and more racism?
As it's nearing exams time, study notes are the major bee archers for the next few weeks. But sometimes it's the small things that tend to annoy. Example: my mum stayed home to take me to the doctor at 12pm (she does get points for that), but still made me wake up at 7:10 to go to school myself. Another small thing I recently noticed, is why do the stickwomen on the toilet doors get dresses, but the guys are naked? Food for thought.
Some shocking images were recently brought to my attention, and this really surprised me and made me go: "Oh yeaaaah."
Most people have seen the caution wet floor is slippery sign but what about these?
Explanations?
Black people fuck animals
Black people are slaves
Black people are drunkards
Black people are gay
White people are heroic firefighters
After seeing these pictures I ask you, what the fiddlestick is wrong with our society?
Some shocking images were recently brought to my attention, and this really surprised me and made me go: "Oh yeaaaah."
Most people have seen the caution wet floor is slippery sign but what about these?
Explanations?
Black people fuck animals
Black people are slaves
Black people are drunkards
Black people are gay
White people are heroic firefighters
After seeing these pictures I ask you, what the fiddlestick is wrong with our society?
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Racism and the English language
If you haven't noticed it yet, you are clinically retarded, because racism is everywhere. It has always been around and most likely always will. Probably in the future Asians, Browns, Blacks and maybe the Mexicans will rise up and sodomise the white people like no tomorrow. But for now ethnicity is a reason to be bullied. I know what it's like too, around Dundas there are loads of bogans and they've given me shit for a decade. But it's time to stop all this people. Lets not be racists, but be embracists. Except for the abos. Fuck the abos. In case you haven't realised, about 150 other countries got taken over by more powerful armies so shut the fuck up. Look at the central americans. After the Conquistadors they don't sit around whining. They jump the border and work as gardeners and cleaners in the US. So fuck off, you stealing, petrol sniffing, unemployed bastards and jump the border. Go to NZ.
Now onto the English language. Hopefully all of you know your alphabet. Apparently Americans don't. Unsurprising. Playing 'Name the states starting and ending in consonants', I found that 'y' isn't a consonant anymore. But onto more pressing matters, fuck the letter 'q'. In my above paragraph you will find the only word containing 'q' is Conquistadors, which isn't even an English word. So why on earth do we need it? Ever since my beginnings in kindergarten I've pondered such a useless letter. Surely 'kw' will suffice? Lets just ignore q from now on and replace it with appropriate letters. Any kwestions can be asked school, don't kyue up though because my kwest for freedom from this letter is kwite arduous. Viva la revolucion!
Now onto the English language. Hopefully all of you know your alphabet. Apparently Americans don't. Unsurprising. Playing 'Name the states starting and ending in consonants', I found that 'y' isn't a consonant anymore. But onto more pressing matters, fuck the letter 'q'. In my above paragraph you will find the only word containing 'q' is Conquistadors, which isn't even an English word. So why on earth do we need it? Ever since my beginnings in kindergarten I've pondered such a useless letter. Surely 'kw' will suffice? Lets just ignore q from now on and replace it with appropriate letters. Any kwestions can be asked school, don't kyue up though because my kwest for freedom from this letter is kwite arduous. Viva la revolucion!
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Inception
Just watched Inception two hours ago. Before I get to a review of that, just got to get some stuff out of the way. This morning I heard my mum ask my sister where Sudan is (don't know how they got to that), and my dumb**** sister says "somewhere in Asia? Wait, New Zealand?" NEW ZEALAND!?!? The f*cking shit is she on! AHHHHH!!!!
So this morning I literally got dressed in the dark and had no clue what I was wearing. On arrival at Parra station people's gaydars were clearly going off. Looking down I realised I was wearing a pink shirt with a purple jacket. Faaaaggooot~ No wonder the manly construction workers were staring with their 'What the fu....' eyes.
Aaaanyways, so most people said that Inception was Matrix-esque; I've read that at least five times before, and I've gotta agree. Starts confusing, but once you get the kinda weird dimensional-shift-style universe the movie is set in, it's totally understandable. Lacking the action Matrix had, lots of explosions but not really any hand/hand combat. I've always hated flashbacks and the same goes for this film. Utterly depressing scenes of Cobb's past are replayed constantly throughout the film. But this doesn't disturb the pace of the film too much. Overall the film is so totally original and different I loved it; the second half was filled with true suspense. Nolan somehow made watching a car spend 25 minutes falling off a bridge exciting. I'd rate it 8.5/10, best film I paid for since...ever? I guess one distraction through the film was the unbelievably slow speed at which frozen cokes melt. 3 hours after buying it I was still drinking the damn thing, just a chunk of ice with about 20mL of coke left somewhere inside, too Asian to through it away.
P.S. If anyone saw the riddle I made up "What doubles when you reduce it?" the answer is a monobrow. Thanks to Gintama's monobrow zombies.
So this morning I literally got dressed in the dark and had no clue what I was wearing. On arrival at Parra station people's gaydars were clearly going off. Looking down I realised I was wearing a pink shirt with a purple jacket. Faaaaggooot~ No wonder the manly construction workers were staring with their 'What the fu....' eyes.
Aaaanyways, so most people said that Inception was Matrix-esque; I've read that at least five times before, and I've gotta agree. Starts confusing, but once you get the kinda weird dimensional-shift-style universe the movie is set in, it's totally understandable. Lacking the action Matrix had, lots of explosions but not really any hand/hand combat. I've always hated flashbacks and the same goes for this film. Utterly depressing scenes of Cobb's past are replayed constantly throughout the film. But this doesn't disturb the pace of the film too much. Overall the film is so totally original and different I loved it; the second half was filled with true suspense. Nolan somehow made watching a car spend 25 minutes falling off a bridge exciting. I'd rate it 8.5/10, best film I paid for since...ever? I guess one distraction through the film was the unbelievably slow speed at which frozen cokes melt. 3 hours after buying it I was still drinking the damn thing, just a chunk of ice with about 20mL of coke left somewhere inside, too Asian to through it away.
P.S. If anyone saw the riddle I made up "What doubles when you reduce it?" the answer is a monobrow. Thanks to Gintama's monobrow zombies.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Americans and others
Watching the Colbert Report I found that Texans are planning to illegalise sodomy. For those who don't know, sodomy is posh for buttsex. Now Texans have attempted to illegalise homosexuality before and failed, but this is the dumbest plan ever. Has anyone in Texas been to prison before? Think about it. The planned punishment for having buttsex is sending a homosexual into an enclosure full of other male prisoners with no female companionship... Do NOT drop the soap.
Elsewhere in the states, there was a news report on Afghanistan. For those who don't know, deposits of rare minerals have been discovered under Afghanistan totalling approx. 1 trillion dollars. I have a feeling mysterious weapons of mass destruction are gonna appear again. Anyway, on Fox News (no surprise), Steve Doocy (or should I say 'Douchey') was talking about how someone e.g. China will invade Afghanistan for their minerals. His reason is quote "it's a great big country that needs a whole lot of stuff". Wow. That is some amazing intellect right there. Such insight into foreign affairs.
Steering away from the US, I would like to join the bandwagon (bagwagon?), in bagging out Twilight. After hearing about how bad the books are I couldn't imagine anything worse. Then came the film adaptions. Some people may remember annoying year 9 girls Twilight chatting at tennis, well I've got a teenage sister. Thankfully I only have one, but that doesn't stop her spoiling dinner by retelling the plot to my mum, thinking she gives a crap. I don't give two fucks about Jacob or Edmond or whatever the fuck his name is, Twilight go to hell.
Finally something good to say, thank god this didn't happen to me on my ski trip. One word: HUMMERED.
Elsewhere in the states, there was a news report on Afghanistan. For those who don't know, deposits of rare minerals have been discovered under Afghanistan totalling approx. 1 trillion dollars. I have a feeling mysterious weapons of mass destruction are gonna appear again. Anyway, on Fox News (no surprise), Steve Doocy (or should I say 'Douchey') was talking about how someone e.g. China will invade Afghanistan for their minerals. His reason is quote "it's a great big country that needs a whole lot of stuff". Wow. That is some amazing intellect right there. Such insight into foreign affairs.
Steering away from the US, I would like to join the bandwagon (bagwagon?), in bagging out Twilight. After hearing about how bad the books are I couldn't imagine anything worse. Then came the film adaptions. Some people may remember annoying year 9 girls Twilight chatting at tennis, well I've got a teenage sister. Thankfully I only have one, but that doesn't stop her spoiling dinner by retelling the plot to my mum, thinking she gives a crap. I don't give two fucks about Jacob or Edmond or whatever the fuck his name is, Twilight go to hell.
Finally something good to say, thank god this didn't happen to me on my ski trip. One word: HUMMERED.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Ski trip
Ski Trip
So I’m back from a 3 day trip to the snowy mountains. I’d like to start with Perisher. If worrying about avalanches and yetis weren’t enough, they gave the mountain a name synonymous with Mount Doom. One epic stack later I was out for the day.
Thredbo was much better except for the food. $14 for burgers and chips. No surprise half the Asians brought a thermos of boiling water and instant noodles.
First night was a horror start. After 8 hours of bus travel, sleep was out of the question. After about 5 hours of staring at the roof I fell asleep only to be awakened by the fire alarm, because someone forgot to turn off the kettle *facepalm*.
There was so much that was wrong with the trip, so here is a short list of stuff witnessed:
Toppest town name: Bredbo (someone was obviously attempting to trick tourists who can’t spell).
Toppest joke: “Can everyone who’s not here put their hand up” –Bus driver
Toppest billboard: “Looks great mown, eh Lisa?” –Lawn mowing business
Roadkill spotto results (admittedly after 6 hours on the bus, my vision started tricking me a bit so some things are a bit suspect)
• 18 kangaroos
• 6 wombats
• 3 possums
• Wallaby
• Fox
• Dingo
• Calf/cow
• Wild boar (wtf?)
• Bear (ok, just a little suspicious)
• Countless piles of “the f was that?”
Finally after 3 days of expensive food, ass breaking stacks, 36 Asians in a bus (1 hot chick), and 4 DVDs of Mr. Bean, I am finally back.
So I’m back from a 3 day trip to the snowy mountains. I’d like to start with Perisher. If worrying about avalanches and yetis weren’t enough, they gave the mountain a name synonymous with Mount Doom. One epic stack later I was out for the day.
Thredbo was much better except for the food. $14 for burgers and chips. No surprise half the Asians brought a thermos of boiling water and instant noodles.
First night was a horror start. After 8 hours of bus travel, sleep was out of the question. After about 5 hours of staring at the roof I fell asleep only to be awakened by the fire alarm, because someone forgot to turn off the kettle *facepalm*.
There was so much that was wrong with the trip, so here is a short list of stuff witnessed:
Toppest town name: Bredbo (someone was obviously attempting to trick tourists who can’t spell).
Toppest joke: “Can everyone who’s not here put their hand up” –Bus driver
Toppest billboard: “Looks great mown, eh Lisa?” –Lawn mowing business
Roadkill spotto results (admittedly after 6 hours on the bus, my vision started tricking me a bit so some things are a bit suspect)
• 18 kangaroos
• 6 wombats
• 3 possums
• Wallaby
• Fox
• Dingo
• Calf/cow
• Wild boar (wtf?)
• Bear (ok, just a little suspicious)
• Countless piles of “the f was that?”
Finally after 3 days of expensive food, ass breaking stacks, 36 Asians in a bus (1 hot chick), and 4 DVDs of Mr. Bean, I am finally back.
Friday, July 2, 2010
End of term 2
Yaayyyy! English is over!!!
But some things just aren't quite right. This blog is for all that anger that can't be released through headshots, so:
Firstly, regarding Wratten's lecture on truancy (it would be so ironic if someone skipped that), a miss would be nice? Wow. A fucking gymnasium would be nice too but a apparently a few million $'s don't buy much these days.
Secondly, where is our eco BBQ? Maybe a student strike isn't out of the question. Coup anyone?
Lastly, in the world of anime, what a tooooooop ending Angel Beats had. Almost made me think about the possibility of maybe pondering the idea that perhaps there was a chance of me shedding a tear. But then School Rumble took that idea away.
So thanks for reading my first ever blog, and hopefully there will be more for me to rage on, after my ski trip.
-tadfg
But some things just aren't quite right. This blog is for all that anger that can't be released through headshots, so:
Firstly, regarding Wratten's lecture on truancy (it would be so ironic if someone skipped that), a miss would be nice? Wow. A fucking gymnasium would be nice too but a apparently a few million $'s don't buy much these days.
Secondly, where is our eco BBQ? Maybe a student strike isn't out of the question. Coup anyone?
Lastly, in the world of anime, what a tooooooop ending Angel Beats had. Almost made me think about the possibility of maybe pondering the idea that perhaps there was a chance of me shedding a tear. But then School Rumble took that idea away.
So thanks for reading my first ever blog, and hopefully there will be more for me to rage on, after my ski trip.
-tadfg
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